Buy Difficult Mothers Reprint by Terri Apter (ISBN: ) from Amazon’s Book Store. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. Difficult Mothers has ratings and 42 reviews. Terri Apter, an internationally acclaimed psychologist and writer, unlocks the mysteries of this complicated. 7 quotes from Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power: ‘ Trying to make sense of other people’s responses to us is a basic human activ.
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In her introduction, Apter mentions a female friend and colleague who warned her against writing her book for precisely this reason. Motuers was a decent book. When a parent [or partner] uses anger or the threat of anger to dominate the emotional atmosphere, then even potentially good conversations with them lose spontaneity, openness and honesty.
S If there’s one thing I appreciate, it’s someone putting my experiences difficlut perspective and letting me know that I am not alone in my perceptions.
If there are two distinct kinds of mother — other people’s and one’s own — then this is a distinction reflected at the core of human nature, between ourselves as objective and subjective beings. Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power by Terri Apter
Understanding and Overcoming Their Power. Thanks for telling us about the problem. If only this book had been around 25 years ago With her personalising of what were intended to be universal tools of self-knowledge, Apter oddly exhibits a version of such characteristics.
Now you know how to overcome the power your difficult mother has over you. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account.
Instead, I suddenly chill to memories of my mother’s angry breath and feel its rhythm in my own heartbeat. She expressed herself in everything, from the food on the table to the washing on the line, was intimately revealed in every room of the house, a creature entirely given over to outward impressions both sensory and actual — a person, in fact, with no privacy.
I suspect the author believes she has accomplished both goals, but that is based on her claims that ‘once you have full understanding of a difficult mothe This ddifficult a well-written book with a great deal of good information about difficult mothers.
Um livro interessante sobre este tema. Overcoming a Difficult Mother’s Power” is about strengthening your sense of self and worthiness in the aftermath of a damaging difficult – or an ongoing relationship with the difficult parent.
We all complain about our mothers, but this author brings to light the painful struggle many of us have in playing the hand we’re dealt at birth.
Her definition is the best I’ve ever heard. Nov 06, Kerry Lewis rated it it was mothrs. She’s mad now, but there will come a time when she’s not mad. The great Alice Miller took a hard line on such circular thinking: Every chapter in this book won’t apply to everyone. Dec 09, Cleokatra rated it it was amazing Shelves: Perhaps your partner’s short fuse does not prevent them from being loving and supportive.
Psychoanalysis might be seen as the attempt to abridge this process, but for most people it is by the slow and iterative business of living that they approach a more dispassionate standpoint.
Mar 09, Audrey Custer rated it really liked it Shelves: What I was afraid of was that she was going to explode and disappear.
Want to Read saving…. Want to Read Currently Reading Read. The author demonstrates how the “self” is really an evolving pattern of responses born from experiences largely inaccessible to one’s working memory.
This book was a self-serving adventure for me. Mothers are blamed for everything, the friend says, and thus their perspective is dispensed with. Great description especially of mother-infant interactions. She showcases the five different types of difficult mother—the angry mother, the controlling mother, the narcissistic mother, the envious mother, and the emotionally neglectful mother—and explains the patterns of behavior seen in each type.
Cart Support Signed in as: Lists with This Book. Illuminating on a topic which is still considered such a taboo. Retrospect is no guide, despite the soft-psychoanalytic suggestion that one can become a better person by understanding the ways in which one was wronged. Refresh and try again.
Difficult Mothers Quotes by Terri Apter
Some quotes I liked. I don’t feel like the categories were fully developed. She also discusses ways one can try to assess the impact such a mother’s behavior might be having on the adult child.
One might define a difficult mother as one who substitutes personal for actual truth, who interposes her own reality in a way that blocks or interferes with the child’s view of “reality” itself.
Loading comments… Trouble loading? Apter also explores the dilemma at the heart of a difficult relationship: I am grateful to have been adopted as a baby by two people who could take good care of me, but at the same time my mother was distant and scrutinizing my every move and word.
But if you find that time after time, a partner or close friend disappoints you by being just like a difficult parent, then you would do well to consider whether you are selecting someone who motheers you reproduce that difficult relationship.
I turn my gaze out my office window, anticipating one of those exquisitely private moments when memories and long-term musings sweep away the deliberations of the day. A woman stuck at home with small children might for the first time be able to see that trrri deity, her mother, as a woman stuck at home with small children; but she is still some way difcicult transposing a difficult mother into something that doesn’t define or threaten the parameters of her own conduct.
The Narcissistic Mother – A mother who uses her difficulh to prop up her poor sense of self, or to frantically avoid shame.